Letter from the Editors, Issue 2.2:

Dearest Classy Readers,

The new format has been surprising us, with our daily numbers increasing every week. And we rarely get surprised, given that we put Four Loko on our Wheaties until our eyeballs protrude like those people that get sucked onto the surface of Mars in Total Recall. Did you hear that they’re doing a remake of that shit? How can you top a three-tittied space prostitute and a midget hooker with a machine gun?

Anyway, Issue 6: We’re blessed to have Thailand cartoonist Kathy Macleod waxing odorous with us from a world away, drawing out the finer points of shopping mall culture that have been on the decline since the Intermall came along. And Aaron Lange was actually taken aback when I brought up Camus the Whale, a piece that he had long thought forgotten that has haunted my comic collection since our days in Ohio; it’s been fun to prove to Aaron that his ancient work holds up to his current orneriness.

I must applaud James Morr for putting a vision on John Tottenham’s work – the painter/author exists in a realm all his own and is a tough nut to crack. We considered recording our own audio of Regret, but not all audiences can smell what he’s stepping in, and that’s what makes John a rare gem in comedy. I’ll turn over the nightmare of  Abide over to my dear friend and partner Kevin Erhard….
 

Abide. I know you’re saying it to yourself in that “hey I can kinda do a Lebowski voice” –voice. Now don’t get all defensive but you suck at doing that voice and you know it. Try this on for size. ABIIIIIDDDEE. Add some bass to it and that growl you got when you first wake up in the morning and you try to impress your co-workers by doing a Dr. House impression. You know that voice that comes in after you’ve slammed down a carton of goldfish crackers  chased it with a liter of diet Mister Pibb. 

Say it. ABBBIIIIDDDDEE.

You’re getting it, now picture saying that over top of a mashup depicting The Dude as a young man in the Alps fighting a shape-shifting alien.

Now that your throat hurts I’d like to thank all the fans who’ve supported us so far. Issue 5 was a tremendous success and Issue 6 is gonna continue shelling the crap out of the Internet Meme-dom.

-Lee Keeler & Kevin Erhard

Mission Statement:

There’s a glut of comedic media out there, particularly with “all-inclusive” sites that pretend to promote the little guy when they’re really just stacking up content that keeps him from the front page. Constant updates don’t mean constant quality, so we avoid the slush pile and post material that we actually enjoy ourselves, each and every piece. With this format, we’re able to give our viewers a release date to look forward to, offering an alternative to the deluge of content gumming up the intertubes. There’s no corporate hook-ups – we’ve built this from the ground up. We’re proud of our Classy Hands, and promote them for a darn good reason.

We’re on a mission here. So help us keep it Classy: give us your feedback, send us your submissions, and help spread the Hands.

Godspeed and Dramamine,

-Kevin Erhard, Co-Founder

-Lee Keeler, Co-Founder

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